Some gang marked this tree for death...

See that white spray paint on the bottom of that tree? A few weeks ago, a gang of young men, probably four or five of them, came by my area and graffito-tagged about a half-dozen trees in my backyard. I didn't get their names, but they were wearing bright orange-colored vests and similar-colored hats. They've been tearing up my neighborhood for weeks now, but I haven't been able to catch them.

I looked on the internet to see what this particular symbol, a white 'X' as it's called by this particular gang, meant. I remember seeing a tattoo of a teardrop on a customer when I worked at HandiMart, and the internet told me it meant that this particular gang member had killed someone. The internet informed me that this so-called "X" bears a similar meaning--but it doesn't mean that this particular maple tree is a hardened criminal--it means it's marked for death by the Orange Hat Gang (OHG).

Five of the six trees that were tagged have been brutally murdered with chainsaws by the OHG. They hacked this guy up pretty good, and you can see they clean cut off one of his limbs, but they let him live. Perhaps it's a warning to the other trees from the OHG, I'm not sure. I never understood the seemingly random actions of this particular gang.

I've seen them before in my town, this gang. Like other gangs, the OHG pimp out there cars. But unlike other gangs who innocently paint flames on their cars and put hydraulics in them to make them bounce, the OHG likes to paint their cars orange and put hydraulic instruments of destruction on them best suited for tearing down forests and digging up dirt. They also like to tear up the streets and close off sidewalks too; taking out trees is just a hobby of theirs. I'm not sure who to write to about this gang, because at times I have seen the police help block off roads and sidewalks so these men can continue their wanton destruction. I suspect that the men in black are just a similar gang in cahoots with the men in orange. They won't rest until the earth is paved over in cement, it appears.

I still don't understand their feud with the trees, though. Trees don't usually fight back. Perhaps one ill-fated night a bolt of lightning struck a tree branch and killed a member of the OHG, and they harbor an arboreal vendetta because of it. But it wasn't the tree's fault it was struck by lightning. It's not like the tree could take shelter indoors during a lightning storm. It was the gang member's fault for seeking shelter under the tallest tree in a thunderstorm...everyone knows that's a dumb thing to do.

But these gang members never seemed too bright. I went to school with a few of them, and they were good kids for the most part. Most of them envisioned leading a successful and meaningful life, but they were eventually led to a crime-filled life of destruction, and so adorned the typical bright orange-colored hats and vests and joined the OHG in order to make ends meet.

I'm not sure if the Orange Hat Gang will return to take this tree's life. If they do, I might call the police. I'll let them know that the OHG is back, and up to their old tricks. Maybe they can catch the crooks in the act this time and teach these punks a lesson. It's about time someone put an end to this wanton destruction. Who's with me?

I am the Lorax, I speak for the trees.

Peace.