Wednesday, March 28, 2007

This Week on Best Week Ever: My Passions / Wednesday: Comedy

I think I'm going to try something new this week, something a little different. This week I am going to focus on my passions--what I love to do on my days off, and what I would be doing if I had a million dollars and never had to work again. I remember my guidance counselor in high school said to figure out what you want to do in life, just imagine what you would do if you had all the money and all the free time in the world. If you'd go fishing, then become a commercial fisherman. If you'd paint, become an house painter. If you'd drink beer, become a construction worker, and so on. Once I have found my passions, I am that much closer to growing up and landing a real job that will make me truly happy. And following your passions is the meaning of life, so I'm told. Here we go...

WEDNESDAY: COMEDY


You know what, forget this week-long blog thing I'm trying to do; it's a stupid premise. Who am I kidding?--I can't commit to anything seriously for one week. Yeah, yeah, yeah, start off with some triptych about your subject, then write six paragraphs or so on the topic du jour. Make it a double parody of Best Week Ever and Passions by exploring who I want to be. And try to make it real serious, like. But people won't get it no matter how hard I try. Not unless I screw the subtlety and bang them over the head with my ridiculous message. It's not their fault, but mine. I need to simplify my message for these post-modern times. Nothing lasts forever...

So all I have to say for today is go here. Right now. Words cannot describe the hilarity...the interchange between me and Dapkeo...the comment from Jim Gaffigan...the Weird Al music...I think I might have actually found my voice. On myspace. Who would have thought a platform for hooking up pedophiles with teenie-boppers could launch my career?! I sure as hell didn't. Oh, and sorry, Melody, for "cweeping" you out. I'm sure you're really a nice gal who's just obsessed with some guy from some comedy group that you don't really understand because you were once young like me...Give it ten years and you'll get it. You'll find your voice. Just quit spamming my inbox with stupid shit about what you did today!!! You aren't funny (just yet)!!! You're teenie-bopper friends might think you are, but I don't! Wait 'til your 27. Or 18. Eighteen is legal in Iowa....

(Tune in tomorrow for more Passions. Like any good soap, I'm gonna save the best stuff for Friday Wednesday...)



Peace.