Monday, March 26, 2007

This Week on Best Week Ever: My Passions / Monday: Vid-G-O Games

I think I'm going to try something new this week, something a little different. This week I am going to focus on my passions--what I love to do on my days off, and what I would be doing if I had a million dollars and never had to work again. I remember my guidance counselor in high school said to figure out what you want to do in life, just imagine what you would do if you had all the money and all the free time in the world. If you'd go fishing, then become a commercial fisherman. If you'd paint, become an house painter. If you'd drink beer, become a construction worker, and so on. Once I have found my passions, I am that much closer to growing up and landing a real job that will make me truly happy. And following your passions is the meaning of life, so I'm told. Here we go...

MONDAY: VID-G-O GAMES


I used to want to play video games all day. Every day. So I used to want to be a game tester, but then I found out I'd have to play just a small part of the game over and over again ad nauseum looking for bugs. I wouldn't get to play any full games, because they aren't finished testing them yet. Being a game tester would take all the fun out of playing video games in the first place, so that idea was out.

Then I thought I could be a game designer. But I don't really have any good ideas for games. I told Jeff at work that we should make a game based on being an Expo at Red Lobster. Kinda like the old-school Burgertime, only slightly better. You'd have to run around avoiding the servers who get in your way doing all the broiling, grilling, microwaving, and frying at first, but later on in the game once you'd completed enough tickets (and got enough bonus points for successful combos for getting all the food out at the same time, making the servers, guests, and managers happy), you could hire a broiler, assembler, and fry guy to help you out. But like all NPC's, the AI would be a little weak, and you would get messages on your screen such as "Your fry guy has wandered off," and "Your broiler has fallen asleep--kick him to wake him up." The goal would be to make as much money for Red Lobster as possible, and your character would get a small percentage of the profits (>.001%), just like in real life. But I don't have the slightest idea of how to make video games. Jeff does--he says he's moving to California in six months to start a career in the video game industry as an artistic director since he recently graduated with an art and film degree from the University of Iowa. But he didn't seem all that interested in the idea of producing the Red Lobster All-Stars video game with me, so that idea is out too.

When I got laid off from Copyworks, my first 'real' job after I dropped out of college, I played video games all the time because I was bored and had nothing better to do. Three months later, when I hadn't even started looking for a new job because I was too distracted killing people in my favorite video game of all time, Grand Theft Auto, I got a message from my landlord saying he would have to evict me for nonpayment of rent. So I decided to look for a job that day, and the first place I went to was two blocks away to Taco John's to get something to eat. After I placed my order, I asked for an application. "What the hell," I thought. "It can't hurt to apply here, just in case I can't find a better job today." I didn't expect the owner to come to my table mid-bite and ask me when I could start. I was so shocked, I didn't know what to say. I had a mouthful of food, and mumbled something incoherently. "Great! Come back here and we'll get you a uniform!" the owner said. The next ten months can only be described as Hell on earth as I learned the in's and out's of working in a fast food restaurant. One day I became so depressed and suicidal that I decided to walk out mid-shift before I did something stupid. I spent the next two months looking for a job and playing video games all over again.

Then I landed a job at HandiMart, a now defunct local gas station/convenience store chain in Iowa. I got to know almost every single person here in Coralville who stopped in to fill up their car or grab a soda on their way to work. I also learned that when people enter a gas station, they are hedonistically evil. They only care for feeding their immediate desire to be a good consumer and buy impulse items at ridiculously high prices. They could care less about the feelings of the clerk behind the counter, and when feeding their vices for smoking, drinking, gambling, eating junk food, etc. are content to take out their grievances with their life on the clerk on the other side of the counter. "These cigarettes are too expensive!" "I don't want ethanol gas--I heard it rots your engine!" "It's too hot outside!" "This soda is too cold!" "I want to turn in these dirty cans so I can buy a lottery ticket!" are all conversations I imagined pedestrians from HandiMart saying in Grand Theft Auto as I ran them over in my car. So I quit HandiMart and again spent a couple months playing video games and looking for a new job--this time one that didn't involve working directly with the public. I wanted to be hidden in a back room somewhere doing menial tasks, not out front making small talk with people as I rang them up just so I could hear them bitch about their lives.

I currently work as a line cook at Red Lobster, and will be training to Expo once Jeff leaves for California to develop video games. On my days off I don't play video games that much anymore. I'm usually too busy with my new hobby blogging my life for all to see. I'm happier now when I get off of work, and even on the busiest days I go home I don't hate people. As a line cook the worst I ever have to deal with is servers screaming in the window for their food. But since I see these servers every day and have formed casual relationships with them, I don't mind the screaming as much as if it came from a stranger. I understand their frustration. Servers are on my side. We're fighting a losing battle against the increasingly frustrating consumers whining for their food. I often feel like we're feeding mindless consumers, human cattle, working at Red Lobster. But it's ok, I don't have to ever see these fat cows. I don't have to imagine them as I run over pedestrians playing Grand Theft Auto anymore. I bought the new GTA: Vice City Stories for my PS2 for $20 a few weeks ago when it came out, but I hardly ever play it. I'm happier now, and the cynical side of me is melting away now that I'm growing up. I'm realizing once you get to know people, they aren't that bad.

So now I'm trying to figure out what else to do with my life. Video games are out, now that I'm maturing. They're too distracting and can take up too much time if I'm not careful. It's easy to have no life and play video games all day to forget your problems, but I don't want to do that any more. I want to find my real passions and live a real life, not a virtual one trapped inside some video game killing people.

(Tune in tomorrow for more Passions. Like any good soap, I'm gonna save the best stuff for Friday...)


Peace.

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